Ehem... It's one of my first novel, so it may be BAD. I'm not sure what others think about it, and I guess most would hate it. But still, I'll take that... 'Risk'.

My chapter ain't that long, since this is just going to be a short story.





Chapter 1
-Life-


...

It was dark.

Real dark...

Behind every door, a dark world existed.

...

Day: Friday

Time: 6.53pm

…

A girl at the age of 14 is walking by the streets, without anyone noticing her. Her hair is messy, and she had her right eye tied up by a torn cloth. Though nobody seems to notice her, everyone’s avoiding her, gossiping.

Voices are merely sources to pollution.

She stopped, as crowds passed by her, slowly forgetting her existence. She turns up, to the red, crescent moon which is going to take over the night.

Night is falling…

The girl turns back down, as a small kid stares at her.

Eyes are weapons... To kill.

The kid’s face turns blank, and fell onto the ground. His eyes opened wide, but his pulse’s gone and breathless. Crowds surrounded him, as she left.

Either get yourself killed or others.

...

Day: Friday

Time: 10.48pm

...

Solus is sitting in the corridor of the streets, as night took over. The crowds are gone, and those who accompany her right now, are those who lusted for free money.

She herself… Lusted for powers.

A killing eye… Is worthless.

She turns her eyes downwards, facing a cockroach. Trying to get to the trash to hunt for some supper, she stopped it from doing so. The cockroach stopped, and she started to get closer towards it. But, one beggar got the cockroach before her, and quickly puts it in his mouth, chewing it. He grins after that, towards her.

All of the sudden, she was mad.

Humans do stupid things to end their lives earlier.

She turns to the beggar, and after a second, the beggar was already struggling on the ground, putting his hands around his neck. He's choking. Solus stood up, and turns forward.

Humans only deserve deaths.

She walks, and never even wanted to turn back to the beggar, who is breathless after a few minutes.

…

Day: Saturday

Time: 6.13am

…

Solus was sitting, closing her eyes to rest. She was in between two tall buildings, in the center of the darkness. Her only accompanies are trash cans, pests, insects.

Day is taking over…

Light rays shoot towards the darkness, cutting through it, causing her relaxation to stop. Slowly after some time, there are crowds around the streets again, just like everyday. Noises start to spread, as the whole town is now lively.

But somehow… Some dislikes it. More to, despises it.

She opened her eyes, and faces forward. “Another day has arrived.” She whispered, to herself. “Another day…”

...

End of chapter

It's short for a first chapter, but it's decent. The killing eye is interesting enough to keep someones attention. Though I personally think you should add more detail. (Detail paints a picture, course that's how I try to write with as much detail as possible, you can write anyway you want, you might just want to go into more detail, on their deaths, or something. . .it's your story whatever) The Day format I don't see that often so that's new. It's good enough to keep my attention, long as it evolves into a bigger story, hopefully explaining that eye of course.

Told you, I ramble too much, if I have a post less then four lines long, it's a miracle

About the eye... It would be explained more in the 4th chapter if I planned correctly. And the comments you gave actually helped me quite a lot XD.

Well, then you just need to organize more, I try to think out parts in the story ahead of time. So that I know what I'm going to write later, then I work towards getting there, and once it's there it's even easier to write. That's just what I do to organize, hell the story I had organized years ago, but never wrote down I still have stuck in my head. (oddly enough though I did write the Prologue and some of the 1st chapter. . .which were over 25 damn pages long. . .when I actually set my mind to it I write a lot heh)

That's my main problem as a writer. I can write and have an entire story planned out. . . .I just need the motivation to do so! :lol':

I can never figure out if someone's serious or not when they use the XD . . .what is X D anyway? Never figured that out either.

Well, I failed in my quest to not ramble. . .again. . .well, I look forward to more if you put it up.

Uhh... x D contains a LOT of meanings... For me, it's just like when I mentioned something quite different(I think) from others, and also when I was being playful. I think....

So, here's the second chapter. I've done it a few weeks ago, and again, I'm never sure if they are good or BAD.



Chapter 2

-Meet-

...

Day is bright.

Yet dark.

So it's how people say it...

Bright in the outside...

And dark in the inside.

...

Day: Saturday
Time: 10.04am

...

She continues to stay at her spot, not intending to move from there for the whole day. She did this everyday, and she did not have any 'visitors' till now, so far at least. But today... Her luck's different.

A ball rolled into the corridors and stops when it hits her leg. She turns and faces towards where the ball comes from. And there, stood a boy.

"I'm sorry about the ball. My friends accidentally hit it too hardly, and it came right here." He said, getting deeper into the corridor and got the ball. "Oh and, why is your right eye covered?" He asked, with curiosity written on his face.

"Just go..." Solus told him, turning away and downwards. "Is it some kind of special eye? Or maybe even an eye that shoots out laser?" He asked, kneeling beside Solus, staring right at her.

Her eyes widened, as the boy backed off quickly. "Wh-What...?" He asked, almost to himself. Even though it's only for an instant, he knew he saw it. An eye. He gasps, and quickly got up, and left, running away.

Solus' eye narrows down, to her usual, as she hides her face between her knees.

...

Day: Saturday
Time: 2.46pm

...

She moved her head upwards, and noticed that she had been asleep. She turns to the direction where there's light, and moves her hand. Her right hand felt something. Something like a box. She got it up, and slowly feeling it with her other hand too. She opened the top, and could smell... Food.

She did not have any second thoughts, and started eating.

4 minutes and 39 seconds later...

She finished it. She places the box right beside her, and someone came. "Enjoy the food?" The boy who came just now, comes back and visits her again. "It's an apology, for just now. I shouldn't just barge in and ask you questions like that. Though I was really curious..." He said, squating down beside her, having a smile between his lips. His hand behind his head, scratching.

She turns to his direction, and said nothing. "By the way, you seemed really hungry. Want somemore?" He asked, digging the bag he was carrying. He brought out another box from his bag. He gave it to her, as she stood up. She is facing not the boy, but two new 'visitors'.

...

Day: Saturday
Time: 3.15pm

...

One of the man had a smirk on his face. "Come on, boy. Get those money from your dad, or your life together with that girl will be in danger." As the boy was about to speak, she stopped him. "What is a small boy to people like you?" She asked in a cold voice. "If you really must know, that boy there is the son of a bastard who owes our boss lots of money." The boy stands up, with his hands tightly gripping his bag with him. "My father does not have business with people like you! So stop saying things like that already!" He yelled, and Solus did not turn at all.

"If his life is what you wished, you'll have no disturbance. But he is one whom I owe, and if owing is such a big thing, then I won't owe someone." Solus said, closing her eyes, and opens them again. The two guys saw the eye again, and backed off. "WTF is that?!" One man shouted, as the other one continues him. "An eye..." He mumbled, slowly backing off. Solus faces them blankly, not having any emotions. But the boy frowns. "What... What are they talking about...?" He was whispering, rather than asking her. "Let's get the heck out of here!" One man shouted, as both left.

...

Day: Saturday
Time: 3.37pm

...

"Thanks." The boy said to her, smiling slightly. "I did that just for repaying the food." She said, closing her eyes, as she was about to leave that place already. "Wait...!" He raises his voice a little, right after she took her first step. "What is your name exactly...? Mine's Timothy. But you can call me Tim."

She did not wish to reply him. But still, he is one who gave her food. "Solus Luna." She said, turning back slightly, but turns back forward again, and left.

...

End of Chapter



Again, I did say that my chapters aren't long, since it's only something like a tryout. ^^"

Again it's decent and interesting enough to keep someones attention. I still say you should be more detailed but it's your story and your style. I like it so far, but yeah they're short. . .Then I noticed that you said it was for a short story so. . .sorry about that, still it's kinda short for a short story, but ehh, it's good enough to keep someones attention. It is decent for a tryout, so far I guess I'd give it a :7/10: :good: Look forward to the next chapter

Thank you for the rating. I didn't expect it to be that... High. Anyways, here's the third chapter, and I haven't finish my fourth chapter yet, and have to wait for quite a while for the next chapter.



Chapter 3
-Trap-


...

Night is falling once again…

And to some people,

It’s just like hope is falling into their hands

Again.

…

Day: Saturday

Time: 7.34pm

…

Weekends, is not the time when she is going to enjoy the night. Weekends… Is when family comes out for some entertainment. And surely, the crowds would increase.

Solus walks inside the crowds again, hoping to find a suitable spot that could get her some nice rest for the night. She is ready, for she knows she could not find any nice spot during weekends, and she hoped for her luck to be strong this night.

All of the sudden, she stopped. Her eyes facing forward, but it’s like something is just right in front of her. A rat ran passed her, in the front, and was caught by a special trap, that could grip one’s legs. The rat struggled out of the trap, and continued its running.

Solus walks past the trap, and continues. Somehow, this night, she will be facing more problems… Than finding her perfect spot.

…

Day: Saturday

Time: 10.21pm

…

It had already been for a few hours and she still couldn’t solve her one, tiny problem to find a spot. For she knows, most of her favorite spots are taken. And she knows it too, that more eyes are staring towards her direction.

She continues her walking, not knowing when she will stop. Maybe she’ll stop only when she reaches to the end of the world, but no one really knows, not even her herself.

By this time, usually the people would just decrease. And it did. But still, the crowds are still too much for her. She wished she could just decrease them by eliminating some. But she chose not to. ‘Cause she knows, she had more enemies waiting for her.

She stopped once again, facing to the front. A gang of people are standing in front of her, blocking her way. She ignored them, and turns a little, trying to take a huge semi-circle around them, and just walks past them. But one stops her again from doing so. “Get away…” She mumbled.

“Scare off our brothers this afternoon, didn’t ya?” One said, more to shouting at her. “I did not intend to ‘scare’ them away. How should I know if their level of fears can be that low… They shouldn’t even be qualified to be a gangster.” She said in a cold voice, not facing them.

The crowds all tries to avoid them, knowing that a fight might soon occurred. Solus knows too, and she wouldn’t mind. She is having a bad mood, not able to find her one spot. “Why you little…!” One said, getting a stick up and was going to hit her. She turns to him, avoiding his attack easily, and her eyes widened.

The man backed off, like how the two gangsters did in the afternoon. “They’re right… There’s an eye…” He said, too freaked to move. “Eye? What could be scary about an eye?!” The one that shouted just now, yelled at his man again. He must be the leader, that’s what Solus thought.

“An eye… Could kill.” Solus is already in front of the leader, causing him to fall on the ground, dead. She didn’t give him a chance to live at all, not like when she gave the man just now a chance, and also… Timothy.

The other men surrounded their leader, shaking his shoulders. His eyes are wide opened, and so is his mouth. Somehow, his pupil is looking upwards, and slowly… His pupil could not be seen. Solus moves forward, knowing that this is the end, of the traps the gangsters will put up. Soon, she’ll be facing much more fearful traps, more like wars.

…

Day: Saturday

Time: 11.52pm

…

She finally got her spot. She knows why, she couldn’t find any just now. Those gangsters are the main problem. She is sitting at her favorite place, a place where only darkness accompanies her. She closes her eyes, resting her head on her knees. She never had a thought, and slept.

...

End of Chapter




This chapter may be shorter. I know. ^^'

Hmm, it's interesting enough to keep my attention as I said, that's why it was at a 7. My big beef still though is details, I think it needs more with it's surroundings and deaths among other things, but eh you still provide a good idea of the characters. (Well, really only the main one, but you can still get a good idea on the others) It's decent again, but yeah it's short, it's not bad though. Whenever ya get it done, put it up.

Thanks. Oh by the way... Solus' pic is actually something like this...



And you may expect me about getting the title of this story from the word in the pic, "Perpetual Nature" and just to let you know, you're right. XD

Right? Right about what? Hmm, that pic. looks faramiliar, or at least the pattern on her clothes does.

It reminds me of FMA. And about the right part, just forget it. =P

Uhh. . .you saying you forgot it , or that you won't tell me?

I knew I saw it from somewhere. . .did you draw that or find it on the internet?

I'm saying it's not important, so even if you don't know then, that's alright. And... My drawing sucks a lot, and you expect me to draw something like this??? XD

Ahh, poopy! I knew it was the latter.

Hnm. . .maybe you hired Abel Lao to draw it! :haha: :lol: :haha: :lol:
(You'd only get this if you went to my school, which you don't so. . .ha. . .) :haha:

... If so, you don't have to tell me that. =P

Chapter 4!! Though I did say I'm gonna explain her eye right here, I don't really explain the whole thing. And about her past, maybe I'm gonna write another fan fic about her after this is done which is featuring her past.




Chapter 4

-Truth-


…

Where there’s bad,

There’s good.

Where there are lies,

There are truths.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 9.53am

…

She opens her eyes, and she remembered, it’s Sunday. She tightened her grip, as she stood up. Why can’t humans just work everyday? That question had been wandering around her mind, even though she got her answer.

Because humans are lazy creatures.

She walks, out of the dark corridor, to the streets, which is full of humans. And as usual, nobody noticed her, but she could hear gossips. After walking for a few while, she couldn’t stand it, and went into another dark corridor, and sat down.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 11.34am

…

And, he came again. Bringing food with him again, he walks into the corridor. “I figured you’re here, somehow. And I guess I’m right.” Timothy said, walking towards her, and squats down besides her, handing her the food he brought. She did not turn to him at all.

“Why are you returning?” She asked, in a cold voice. “I thought you might be hungry, so I brought you some food.” She finally turns to him, facing him. “You’re throwing your life away, don’t you know that?” She said, not wanting to take the food from him. “And I don’t need to eat everyday. Just once every week.” She said, turning away. “Is it so? Oh… Then I shouldn’t bring the food today… A week right? I’ll bring food to you next week then.”
Why…

“Like I said, get away from me.” Solus said again, but Timothy continues keeping the food back in his bag. “I guess you would like me to make the same thing as yesterday again, right?” He said, most to himself. “Haven’t you heard me? Get away.” She repeated.

“I can’t…” Timothy said, as Solus turns to him again. “Since I wanted to bring you somewhere.” He said with a cheery smile. “Somewhere…?” She muttered, as he grabbed her hand. When he was about to walk out, she stopped, pulling him back.

“What the gangsters said that day, didn’t you hear them?” He stopped, turning back to her.

An eye…

He remembered, and was waiting for more of her explanations. “My right eye can kill people in an instant.” Solus said, pulling her hand back. He frowns a little, and showed an awkward smile. “You’re kidding right? ‘Cause if it’s so, the gangsters would be dead.” She turns upwards, facing him. “I never really showed them, just like you that day. I nearly killed you.” She continues, turning backwards. “And you still wanted to bring someone who wanted to kill you food?”

“I can stop one’s heartbeat after showing them my right eye. By showing, it means to take this cloth down.” She said, as her left hand reaches to her right eye, which is covered by a cloth. “And after taking it down, I cannot control it.”

“I’ve killed people almost everyday. Their quantity doesn’t really matter to me. Since… I don’t really matter to them…” She mumbled, tightens her right hand’s grip. Images, flowed into her mind, as she remembered some things that happened in her past.

“But still, you’re my friend… And… If you didn’t show me the eye that day, that means you gave me a chance to live right?” Tim says, as he took another step forward. “Don’t you get it? I can’t have this thing called friend. And… That time, just because you annoyed me slightly, I did not kill you. Only those who annoy me a lot, I kill them. Besides, you don’t even deserve to have the chance to see my eye.”

She turns back slightly, having the sort of glare in her eyes. “That’s why, go away now or I’ll kill you.” She said, in a fierce tone. “I don’t mind.” He suddenly said, with a smile. “I don’t mind throwing my life away. Because my life is already over if you don’t want to be my friend.” Her eyes widen, as he grabs her hand again, and pulled her out. “I…”. He mumbled.

I wanted to have a friend…

While pulling her and running, he’s smiling. And somehow, her footsteps are following too.

Why…

She followed him, even though she doesn’t want to.

Why?

...

End of Chapter




Short again. And I'm not sure if it's good.

Those chapters are darn short.
: /
Either way, I can't rate this.
It's not my taste.

Hmm, once again I gotta say it's decent. I'd still rate it at around a 7. It is short still, but that isn't a real bad problem. If you were to elaborate more on the eye later (doesn't matter if it's in a different story, but still it's interesting and "most" people reading would probably want to know more about it) Hmm stil a :7/10:
For some reason this reminds me of Elfen Lied, no where near as deep or violent, but for some reason it does.

Abel Lao would successfully be able to plan a spontaneous attack, that is just an example of their awesomeness. :haha:

Thome - Oh. Anyways, thanks for wasting some time to read it too. ^^

Naota - o.o. I'm slightly flattered.

Chapter 5! Though this is the chapter which I'm not sure if it's good... And again, yeah short I know. =P




Chapter 5
-Friends-

…

When the world is torn apart,

A ray of light cuts through the darkness.

And it’s something called friendship.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 11.52am

…

Still running, with their hands held together, Timothy continues to smile brightly. “You’ll be sure to like this place… Maybe it’s your first time, but don’t worry. I’ll bring you around.” He said, with a cheery tone. She kept the emotionless yet slightly confused look on her face, as her legs continue to bring her with him.

“I wanted a friend…” He said, as her eyes widen slightly, interested in knowing more. “I… Never really have a friend. Everyone always try to get away from me and… I’m tired of that kind of life…” He mumbled, as his smile slowly fades. She’s hearing somehow, and never expected that.

“I used to think I have friends. But all they are, are people who just wanted money from me. Just because… My dad’s rich.” Timothy said, as he stopped the running.

“That’s why I don’t want to see you killing again… It’s illegal…!” He said, turning back to her. “And… I don’t want you to do illegal stuffs just like my dad…” He continued, turning his eyes downwards with a slightly sad look.

She looked at him, and turns forward. “Is this the place? You wanted to go.” She said, in a quiet tone. His eyes turns to her, with his sorrow disappeared in an instant, as he turns to the direction she was looking at. “Yeah… The carnival.” He said with a smile.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 12.05pm

…

“Even though it’s a little crowded, I hope you don’t mind.” Timothy said, pulling Solus into the carnival. “They’ve got rides like roller coasters and some other cool stuff.” He grabbed her hand, and brought her to the counter, and got some tickets for the rides. “It’s my first time here too, since a very long time ago…” He mumbled, as he took the tickets from the counter-man.

“Let’s go.” He had a bright smile and bright eyes when he saw those thrilling rides. Somehow, she went with him, without any objections. After taking a few rides, Timothy had become active, and while Solus is still the same. “It’s fun!!!” Tim yelled a little when he said that. “What do you think of it, Solus?” He asked, turning to her with a smile. She blinks her eyes for a few times, and closes her eyes. “It’s…” She said, thinking back of the rides. She couldn’t think of a word to say.

“Boring… Right?” He said, looking slightly disappointed. “You’ve fought people like gangsters almost everyday… Rides like these are nothing…” He muttered, smiling awkwardly and scratching his head. He turns around to find some other place. “Let’s go to the showroom then. I heard that they are going to have something like a circus performance there.” He said, grabbing her hand again, as they move off to the showroom.

“I used to come here too… When I was 4.” He said again, while giving two tickets to the man who is guarding the spot. Flashbacks poured into his mind, as he remembered of his first time coming here. “My mother brought me here. And because I was small back then, we couldn’t ride those thrilling rides. And my mom was disappointed.” In that instant, Solus remembered of him just now. “But she smiled again, and brought me here.”

They entered the room, and they found two good seats. Even though Solus couldn’t see, the noise reminded her of her past.

Noises…

Images all rushed into her head, as she soon forgets about her whereabouts.

Two men had grins on their face, as one of the men reaches her right eye. She could see everything with her left eye at that time, and she could feel pain, as something sharp cuts her skin. And slowly, when she thought she saw something with her right eye, the man was pushed away, while another looked straight into her eye, and died.

Everything disappeared at once, when someone called out to her. It’s Timothy. “The show’s done, you know. Don’t tell me you missed the whole thing? Don’t worry, I’ll tell you everything about it!” He said with a smile, while she got up from her seat. While walking out from the showroom, everyone’s looking at them.

She noticed so, and so does him. He stopped, and turns back with an awkward smile. “I think we need to get you changed. Everybody’s looking at us.” He said, scratching his head. Somehow, she thought it was weird and somehow… Funny when he looks like that. But she couldn’t laugh. “Change…? With what?” She asked in a quiet tone, and he had an idea. “I’ll bring you to the shop. I have enough money anyways.” He pulled her along, to find a shop that suits her.

But she stopped her footsteps. “Don’t waste money for unnecessary things like that.” She said, facing him. “Unnecessary? But, I don’t think so. Besides, you can change once in a while.” “People are looking at us, because of me. Not because of my appearance. And that’s why, I’m leaving. I don’t get along with people. People… Hates me.”

They… Hated me.

He frowns a little, and took her hand up and puts it on top of his palm, and hit her lightly, on her palm. She was slightly shocked with that, and her eyes widened. “If you don’t get along with people, then who am I? As long as you have a friend, then not all the people hate you. With only one friend, you can prove that your existence is needed in this world.” He said, slowly showing a smile.

He pulled her along again, and she followed, with no more words.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 4.38pm

…

“Here’s the shop.” He said, stopping and looks forward to the shop. “Let’s go in.” He said, pulling her in. But, there are interruptions.

Solus stops him from taking another step, as she showed a glare to them.

…

End of Chapter

Hmm, I really have to find a different word for decent. I'm tired of saying that word! Anyway it's decent still, it's okay, the chapters are still short though, but it's not bad. I guess I'd still rate at a :7/10:

Lolz. ^^

Actually, I've already finished chapter 6,7, and 8 already. And I'm gonna post them up soon. Chapter 8 is the last chapter. And then I'm off to writing a new story. ;)

Chapter 6
-Rivals-

...

It's hard to get a friend,

And it's easy to get a rival.

But your best friend,

Might turn into your worst rival.…

...

Day: Sunday
Time: 4.42pm

…

A fat and tall boy walks out from the back of the other few boys, and had a smirk with him. He pushed Timothy away, as he fell onto the ground. “Hey, Timothy! You still owe us what you promised! Now where’s our stuff?” He wasn’t talking actually, more like yelling at him.

Timothy got up slowly, and Solus was about to start attacking them. “No… Solus… I’ll do this myself.” He muttered, as he got up, and tries to hide his frown from them. “I’m sorry. But I’ll have to get the stuff for you guys some other time… My dad’s not around these days…” He said, as the boy punch him in his stomach again. “You’d thought I believe those damned words of yours?” Timothy fell onto the ground again, and Solus really wanted to at least fight for him a little, but was stopped by Timothy again.

“Solus… I’m sorry but you’ll have to get home first… I’m used to be like this… I just didn’t want you to see me like this…” He said, and Solus’ eyes widened. “You’re girlfriend, Timothy?” The boy said, and the other boys had smirks on their faces too. “Just giving you a little advice, maybe you’re blind, Timothy… But this girl is just damn ugly!” He yelled at Timothy, and laughed, followed by the other boys.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 4.56pm

…

Ugly…

That word rang in her mind, and her eyes widened again. She could see something in her mind, and she tightens her grips. Timothy turns to Solus, and back at the other boys again. “She’s not!” He shouted, standing up and pushed the fat boy away.

The boy got angry, and walks back to Timothy and pushed him. “You thought you’re the best because you’re rich right?! Well, let me just tell you this, heck no!” And, Timothy and the fat boy got into a fight. The fat boy’s other friends, wanted to join in and help their ‘boss’ but Solus was already between the fight and them.

Humans… Are creatures who kill each other.

The boys all charged towards her, and was all ready for a punch on her. But she dodged them easily, and only hits on their back, and the right spot that could make them unconscious. Soon, and easily, all was down. Except for the fat boy that’s fighting Timothy.

The fat boy stops, and he turns to his back, noticing all the others are down. He turns to Solus, as she was already in front of him.

Leaders are the ones who need 'treatments'.

She said, and the boy fell onto the ground, and is already breathless. Timothy’s eyes widened, and he quickly got down, checking and seeing if the boy’s still alright. “He’s already dead.” Solus said, turning down to Timothy.

“Why…” Timothy mumbled. Solus is slightly confused, and she frowns a little. “’Why’? Because he deserves to…” She answered him, as he quickly got up. “Solus, nobody deserves death!!! You shouldn’t kill him! Just punish him a little or fright him away is enough!! But killing him?” Timothy said, a little lost control. The crowds all heard him, and turn to them. Timothy suddenly got scared, as he turns from the crowds and back to Solus. “You’ve… Just… Commited a crime in front of everybody…”

At this point, she knows, she may be sent to jail. But that, she doesn’t mind. What is making her mad now, is the fact that Timothy said those things to her. Timothy shooks his head very slowly, with a scared face, and Solus turns away. She walks and Timothy’s eyes widen. “Where do you think you’re going?!” He yelled, but she did not answer.

Now… Everybody hates me.

Even though she is calm now, she is mad. For what he told her before, she kept all those clear in her mind. If everyone hates her, she should just get rid of them. Even… Timothy himself. “You’re just a human. And I made my biggest mistake by saving your life that time.” She said to Timothy, and Timothy fell onto the ground, and tears could be seen rolling down his eyes.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 5.25pm

…

She is back on the streets, and every second, she got angrier.

Eyes…

She turns to a girl, who is staring at her with an innocent face, and killed her. She turns back forward again, and killed another person who is staring at her while gossiping about her. The person’s friend then shouted out. “She’s… Dead!!!” With her eyes widened, she turns to Solus, and was killed again. The mother who was holding her daughter’s hand, shouted out too. “She killed… My daughter!!” The crowds all start to scattered, all afraid that they might get killed by her.

She got very very angry, when all the crowds that scatter around, stare at her. At the center of her clothes, a symbol appears, and shines. Slowly, her feet are off the ground, and she’s flying. Dark energies are released from her, and blood starts to spill from every corner once in a time.

Humans are… Hateful creatures…

…

End of Chapter

Chapter 7! The second last chapter! Will post chapter 8 tomorrow! Enjoy!



Chapter 7
-War-

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 5.43pm

…

The people are now screaming, escaping. The police arrived, and all of their cars explode, as Solus faced them. The police who aims their guns at her, all backed off, afraid. “She’s a monster…” A lot of them mumbled this, and she heard all of them.

Monster…

The energy released by her got much more enormous, and even the glass on the shops all broke into pieces. The sky had turn into red, just like the blood that is spilled around the streets and buildings. As for the moon that is showing itself, its shining red. And so are the symbols on her clothes that are shining more and more every second. Slowly, the corpses that lay about the streets, starts to have the same symbol on their wound.

They can’t be forgiven.

And at that very moment, only person appears inside her mind.

Timothy…

And her powers got weaker, as her feet slowly reaching the ground. The symbols did not shine anymore, and no more dark energies are released from her. She had a tear falling down from her eye, and one drop only.

Someone from the corner of the streets catches everything with his senses. “Perfect.” And that figure disappears.

Solus could sense someone with enormous energies coming out, but she couldn’t tell where after using so much energy. She collapses.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 6.32pm

…

Timothy is at the police office currently, as the police all tries to get information from him, knowing that he isn’t the one who killed the boy just now. And the television is opened. When the police ask him about the incident again, the television shows the scene on the streets.

“Some of the passer-bys here said that they had seen a girl, around the age of 14, floating in the air and blood is spilled around the whole area. And currently, there are 43 deaths and is estimated in only less than an hour. Just a few minutes ago, the police had caught the suspected culprit, but she escaped as the police tries to stop her.”

And the television starts to show a video of the police catching Solus. At that moment, Timothy is watching. Slowly, he stands up, and his eyes didn’t blink at all. “Solus…” He mumbled, and ran away from the room, and outside the police station. The police who were watching the television too, all runs to catch Timothy as soon as they noticed him running away.

“Solus…” Timothy called out, as he runs.

Where are you… Solus…
…

Day: Sunday
Time: 6.45pm

…

She is walking, into the corridor. She winced, as the wound she got from the police just now stings her. Almost all of her energies are used up, but still she forced herself. As soon as she is inside the corridor, the police all can be seen passing by, and didn’t notice her. She gasps for breath, as she fells onto the ground.

She thought of Timothy again, and her eyes widened when she thoughts again when he shouted at her.

Humans…

And laughs could be heard. Solus knew it instantly, that it wasn’t good.

“It’s been for a day, isn’t it?” A group of gangsters walk into the corridor, following their leader, who is a thin man but tall. He had a cigarette, and also a stick. “Killed our boss didn’t ya? And right now, you’re just pathetic…” The man said, and walked over, and kicked her.

She didn’t have the strength to fight back, and she only fells on the ground. Slowly pushing herself up, she faces the man with a glare. “If I’m pathetic… Then your leader is just plain stupid.” She said, still catching her breath. The man smirks even more, and so are the other gangsters. “You can say that.” He said, lowering himself to about her height currently. “Thanks for getting rid of him for us.”

The man got up again and laughed. “Beat her up, guys!” He raised his voice a little at this point, as the men all start to beat her up.

And somehow, this is familiar. Her eyes widened and dark energies are released from her again. Images returned into her mind, and the symbols on her clothing shine again.

Some men backed off, but one is about to hit her with a bat, but is pushed away by an invisible force. All the other men were shocked. And at that time too, Timothy arrived. “Solus!” He shouted, as Solus’ eyes return to her normal ones.

Timothy…

But, the men all slowly start to spill blood out, as her powers are affecting them already. Timothy is late. He runs to the center of her and the gangsters, and extends his hand, just like stopping her. “You don’t have to do this, Solus!” He yelled and Solus’ eyes only widened.

But, her mind reminds her again of what Timothy had shouted to her. Her eyes returned to the emotionless ones, and her right hand moves to the front, facing Timothy. Her fingers moved, and is about to crush him too. “The police are coming and they might catch you! So go now! I don’t want you to go to jail!!!”

Her fingers stopped. The light that shines from her starts to fade, as her feet are reaching the ground again. She is back to her normal self. She fell onto the ground, gasping. Timothy runs to her, and the other gangsters all ran away. Timothy got to her front, kneeling down.

“Go now… I’ll just admit to the police…”

And he smiles.

…

End of Chapter

God damnit, I need to find a theasourus, I'm tired of saying decent! Don't worry a different word that means the same thing but sounds more impressive will commet on the last chapter! I SWEAR IT!

Anywho, it's decent again, you have a few places with grammer problems (mostly during the parts with the police), the chapters are short, but still a fine length. It's interesting enough. :7/10:

Chapter 8
-Perpetual-

…

Once upon a time,

There was a girl,

Who is destined to live a life of…

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 6.37pm

…

“No! Don’t go…!” She raised her voice a little, and her hand reaches to his hand, and pulled him down. “No… Don’t…” She mumbled again, weak.

But, he smiles. “No, Solus. I must go. Even though, I didn’t want to…” His other hand reached to hers, and pushed her hand away. He stands up, and she just didn’t do anything. All this, had happened too fast.

He left, without leaving any words anymore. And she just sits there, quietly. The only things that entered into her mind now, is the times when she meets him, only two days ago.

I’ve changed… In 48 hours time.

Because of her still weak from everything just now, her eyes slowly narrow, and soon, she wanders off into her dream.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 8.56pm

…

“Solus…” Someone called out for her, almost whispering. She moved her eyes, and opens them. Timothy is just right beside her, carrying a smile with him. “It’s already nearly 9. I know you said you only needs to eat once a week, but I also know you’re weak from all that.” He said, handing her the food he brought.

She could smell it, and she took it from him. She opens the cover, and took out the food with her hand, and puts it in her mouth. She chews it, and it tastes like the one he brought before. “It’s… Tasty.” She said, in a quiet tone. “Is it?” He answered, with a slightly happy tone. She nods her hand, and continues.

While she’s eating, he’s watching her, and smiles brightly. “I never did tell you this. But I have always wanted to tell you. I did mention a little before in the carnival. But the truth is, my parents never really live with me now.” He said, turning downwards, but still holds his smile.

“My mom died when I was 5. And then, my father seldom returns, and when he did, he always brings some other girls back. And suddenly, after that day, he never returns. And it’s been so for 3 years. I’m leaving with my butler now, who take cares of me after my mother died.

He’s always been like my second dad, and he is really good… I just don’t know… How to repay him…” He said, having a tear falling down to his cheeks. “My dad did send money back to us, not really much a month, but enough for our meals. And after a few months he left, he got rich and very famous around here. And that’s when the other people at school start to be my friend, in order to get the things they wanted…”

“Right now, Aaron is old. He’s already 55 years old. But still, he always tells me he’s fine, and does those hard things for me…” He said, and more tear drops from his eyes. “Before he came here, he already had a disease, and I’m the only one other than my mother who knows that. But not my dad. Not him…”

Solus stops her eating and she heard everything. She is not a good adviser, neither has she ever advice anyone. “Tim…” She is about to say something, but he shakes his head, with a smile as he wiped his tears away. “Solus, don’t mind me. Eat up, since this is going to be the last meal I can make for you.” He said, in a gentle tone, and she is slightly surprised by that.

Last… Meal…

While Solus is eating, he talks to her. And to him, this is one of the best times in his life. He closes his eyes, and laid his head against the wall. After she finished her eating, she continues to listen. He told her lots of things, all the things that happened in to him all of his lifetime. She enjoys listening too.

And he talked, and she listened. And seconds, minutes, and slowly hours passed.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 11.55pm

…

She is finally asleep, that’s what Timothy thought. He smiles and stands up. He took a last look at her before leaving, and left a tear for her. “This is what they call, silent farewells, huh?” He mumbled, and turns back forward, and leaves.

He walks down the corridor, by himself, with his hands in his pockets, he’s facing downwards. “It’s my last thing to do. My last task, isn’t it, Aaron?” He talked to himself, but he could remember about his last talk with Aaron before. “I just wanted… To live a normal and happy life… And I guess I can’t…” He said, laughing a little at this point.

“Yeah. Most people can’t. People like you and me.” A man, with his eyes blindfolded is standing inside a dark corridor. Timothy stops, and turns to him and smiles slightly. “You’re right.” And he walks into the corridor, and blood spills to the wall.

…

Day: Monday
Time: 8.32am

…

Solus woke up, and she walks out from the corridor. She hears to the crowd, and she thought, all those are just dreams…? She walks down the streets, and again, no one noticed her.

It’s normal alright…

She walks, and was about to stop and rest herself in the corridors again, until there came noises from somewhere not far away from them. Out of curiosity, she walks to the crowd, and she could smell blood.

“It’s only a boy around 14 or so…” “Poor boy…” “I heard his father is rich…” “I also heard he’s living by his own…” “Why is he dead then…?” “How should I know?”

All kinds of dialogue could be heard, but sadly, she couldn’t see who it was, laying on the ground. And there, came a voice of a kid.

“It’s… Timothy.”

…

A life of perpetual loneliness.

…

His life had come to an end. But in truth, his death brought up the starting of the end of…?

…

End of Story





There's another story that is going to be the continued version of this. ^^ I'll try making that story a little longer.

Oh and gimme some time for the next story... Having tests these days...

Hmm, a fine story, not the greatest I've ever read, but it's decent, oh and good luck on those tests. I might have to post some of my stuff, you know, get off my lazy ass for once and do something :lol:

Second story. I continued it here, since I still haven't got a title for this. Heh ^^" Well anyways, I really tried making it longer, and I hope it's enough. ^^' Well, enjoyz!




Chapter 1
-Shadows-

…

The shadows that brought back images,

To her mind,

And her past that is unforgettable.

…

Day: Tuesday
Time: 10.34pm

…

The shadows of the crowds walk past her, as she sat on the corridor, just right beside the road. Since those things that had happen just a few months ago, she never slept or stays in the dark places anymore. Those who sat beside her are those beggars, and again, they’re begging for money. But her, she’s just sitting there, facing the moon, wandering her mind off. These days, somehow, lots of things kept on bugging her, playing inside her mind.

She closes her eyes, sniffing in the air around, and she could smell smoke and such other stench. And soon, these stenches brought her to sleep, a deep sleep.

Dream

A crying sound can be heard, and she appears to be in a hospital. And then, something passed through her, it was a pregnant woman; being quickly sent to the ward, for the baby seems to be coming out soon. Somehow, she could see with her eyes, both of her eyes.

She followed them, without even knowing it, she is already inside the ward. Walking towards the side of the bed, she looked down to the woman, who seems to be wincing as she could feel the baby forcing to come out. Solus narrows her eyes a little, seeing how pain the woman is in.

After the woman is set to sleep, the doctors started the operation. And all that time, Solus is looking at the woman, and then her stomach, and then her organs. After quite a long time, the baby is carried out by the doctor. The other doctors seem to be smiling, even though their mouths are covered. She turns back down, as the doctors start to sew her stomach back.

And at that moment, she stares at the baby, who is surrounded by a few doctors, examining the eyes, especially the right eye that is sealed by the skin. So actually, the doctors thought that the baby doesn’t have a right eye. Solus walks over to the baby, and slowly, the surroundings all went blank.

And the baby is looking at her, with the left eye, staring back at her. At that very moment, the baby showed a glare, and she quickly backed off, and the baby disappeared.

And then, a girl around the age of 1 is sitting on the ground, right behind her. She turns, and looks downwards at the girl. The girl blinks towards her, with an innocent look. Suddenly, the girl smiles.

She extends her hands, as if wanting someone to carry her up. Solus frowns a little, and walks closer to her, but then again, someone walks through her body again, and carries the baby up. Solus turns to the person, and notices it’s the same woman as before. The woman reaches her nose with the girl’s and smiles brightly. The girl smiles, and laughs.

Must be her daughter…

She thought, and then the two of them disappears again. And next, another person appears. A girl, the same girl, but is already around 4. She is standing straight, and just like Solus, her right eye is covered with a cloth, to hide herself from revealing about the absence of her right eye. Her hair is tidy, and she is wearing a T-shirt, with pants, but she’s crying.

The woman appears, and she seems to be on bed. The girl kneels down beside the bed, and cried out loud. And this reminds Solus, of something. The woman had her eyes close, lips sealed, hands put together, and her face is taking a calm look with her. The girl cries and cries, and then all disappeared, except for the white background.

Then, everything changed in an instant, and so is the background. In less than one second, everything changed, and Solus’s eyes widened, as she saw two men in front of her, with her tied up on the bed. One of the men had a knife in his hand, and both of them had grins.

And, she woke up.

…

Day: Wednesday
Time: 5.30am

…

The sun is already visible, and the beggars are already awake, searching for food around the trash cans. She turns around, and got up from that spot. She couldn’t remember her dream, and she never even knew she had a dream.

She went around the city, to search for food just like the beggars.
On the way of searching for food, she frowns more and more. Somehow, her dreams seem to be returning to her mind.

I… Dreamt of those…?

The last image bugged her the most, and at that time, she stops. Her left hand punched to the wall, as she saw the last image again. Her left eye’s widened at that time, and she gasps for breath. But she tries to keep a calm look, trying not to gain attention.

She continues her way, after calming her mind down. The same dream keeps on bugging her every time she gets into sleep. And, she is tired of it already. Just when she is thinking about it, she smells food, for it’s leftovers on the streets. She stops, and squats down, and gets the box up, and opens it, and eats.

It reminded her of Timothy’s food, but she tries to ignore herself. Even though the food is rotten, to her, it’s still like new, fresh food. She enjoys herself, at least. She had a few thoughts through her mind, while eating. !!(a)!!

(b)And when she finishes, she puts the box down and sat down, leaning against the wall. She closes her eyes, but she didn’t fell asleep, keeping herself awake, so that she wouldn’t see the same dream again.

But still, she couldn’t control herself. And when she is just about to fall asleep, she felt a strong sense of… Inhuman powers.

She opens her eyes, and her head turns towards the direction she felt. This feeling is familiar, and somehow, the last image appears in her mind again.

For a second, it seems to her that someone’s there, and the next, no one’s there anymore. She frowns again, and narrowed her eyes. She turns back down, and face downwards, lost into her mind, wandering about stuff.

…

Day: Wednesday
Time: 8.12am

…

She snapped out of her thoughts, as the crowds got bigger and bigger until some knocked her. She got up from her place and walks away. With her mind still full of thoughts, she just walks straight ahead, not knowing where to stop.

And, she stopped all of a sudden. She turns to the corridor beside her, which is dark and similar to the places she used to be around. She could hear something. She turns and takes a few steps, but stop before she totally entered the corridor.

“Who’s there?” She asked, in her usual cold voice. But her face is rather cautious than emotionless.

“It’s just…” That sound, it rang through her mind. “Me, Solus.” But even though it’s like a voice she heard before, she still couldn’t confirm it. “Who are you then?” She continued her question, but he only answered, “You’ll remember eventually…” She frowns even more, when she got that answer.

Her eyes widened, and suddenly, she got up.

…

Day: Wednesday
Time: 8.25am

…

She slept in, and she still had the box in her hands. She slept, when she was eating the food she found. She remembered her dream again, and frowns. [1]

It’s not real, is it?

She puts the box on her side, and stands up. Noticing the crowds, she turns again, and walks away. And this time, she is aware of any sensing of inhuman strength, but no.

It isn’t real…

She let out a deep sigh, but hides it from others. She is slightly relieved, somehow and she didn’t know why. She turns back forward, and walks.

And again, her footsteps stop, by their own, as she turns to her right hand side, noticing a corridor, just as dark as the one she saw in her dreams. Her eyes widened, but this time, it’s not a man’s voice, but a girl’s.

“You’re Solus Luna right?” A fairy came out of the darkness, trying to hide itself from the people. Solus heard a winy sound, and knows it’s not a human right away. “Who are you?” She asked, slightly colder than her voice in her dreams.

“You must get out of this city right away! Follow me and I’ll bring you to a place where you’ll soon be heading.” The fairy told her, and she did not believe her, at least not completely. “And I should trust you?” She asked, frowning. “We can’t talk about this now! We have to go before he comes for you!”

And at that moment she mentioned ‘him’, the dream got into her mind, her first and second dream, especially her second dream. “There’s someone aftering you!” The fairy raised her voice a little, but not loud enough for the people outside to hear her. Solus is listening, and she might believe her. “Just come with me!” And the fairy pulled her sleeve and tries to pull her out of the corridor with all her strength. But she could move Solus a bit.

Solus thought for a while, and knows it right away when she pulls her, that she is a fairy. “I’ll go, but if there’s no good explanation, you’re dead.” Solus said, and the fairy only nods her head quickly, saying ‘Mmm!’ each time she nodded. And when they are out on the streets, the fairy hides itself in Solus’s hair. Flying right beside her ear, the fairy whispered to her. “Follow my instructions and I’ll bring you to a safe place first.”

Solus followed her instructions, and soon, they are out of the city.

And from the tallest building of the city, a blindfolded man stands on top of it. Facing Solus, he smiles a little, and slowly grins. “You’re fast, fairy. But I’ll just lend her to you first. There’s going to be a war soon anyways…”

And the man’s back, had wings spread out, as he flies away.

…

End of Chapter




Notes:

(( Scroll back up to a part where you'll see a [1] for this ))

[1] You guys MIGHT have slight confusions in this part. Umm… scroll back up and you’ll notice a part where I marked (a)((The '!' is for attention)). Now that is the time when she accidentally slept in, and she didn’t know about it. (b ) is when her dream starts. And when it’s 8.12am, her dream continues at that time. So, sorry if there are confusions. ^^”

It's interesting, and once again decently written. Your skills seem to have improved slightly and it's overall good. Hmm. . . a 7.5

Heh thankx. I'm still writing the 3rd chapter and will post the 2nd chapter soon.

I like what I'm reading but I'm only half way its pretty well decent and you got me tooked up on this topic but I'll you what I think when I'm done reading.
I give it a 8/10. :)

Sorry this took me a while. I've finished chapter 3 too, and I need some time to check the whole thing again. Though I didn't really check much for this chapter... Well anyways, enjoy! ^_^




Chapter 2
-Message-

…

Pulled away from home,

By someone who isn’t human,

And being told she’s in danger.

…

Day: Wednesday
Time: 9.12am

…

Solus stops her footsteps, turning backwards to the city. She knows there’s someone watching them just now, since she's very sensitive to stares. But the fairy continued to pull her, and she turns back forward and followed.

Soon, they entered a forest, and Solus turns to the fairy. “Now, tell me.” The fairy stopped as well, turning back to Solus. She had an awkward look on her face, and she sighed, sitting down on a grass. “Okay… Umm… I actually got an order from Miss Calwyn that someone is aftering you, and that he is already in your town. So that’s why I wanted to bring you out this quickly. But…” Before she could finish, Solus asked. “Who’s Calwyn?” She asked, slightly frowning.

“Miss Calwyn is my master. She… Is an elf who loves to collect weird magical stuff. And one of her stuff is to know what her task is. She knew something got wrong, and she uses it, and that ‘stuff’ told her to meet you.” The fairy explained, and Solus listened carefully. “And how should I know if I should trust you or him?” Solus asked, and the fairy got a troubled look. “Because…!! Because Miss Calwyn won’t do any bad things! She’s only doing this so you wouldn’t…!!” The fairy raised her voice a little, and Solus turns away. “Wouldn’t?”

The fairy sighed, and she flew up. “You see, Miss Calwyn knows there’s going to be a war soon, around the elf’s land, and she…” “She wants me, right?” Solus cuts in before she could finish. “No! She just thought that, if you continue to stay there, the city you’re living at might get involved, and she did not want humans to get involved.”

At this, she frowns. “What do you mean by that?” Solus asked, and the fairy sat back down again. “You see, for someone like you who had faced so many things, having creatures like us in front of you is nothing. But humans do not know of our existence. To them, we are just mythical creatures. The humans couldn’t find traces of us, is because we casted a barrier around the creatures’ land. And that barrier will prevent the whole land from being visible to the humans. For, the humans might want to have powers like us, and may do some unnecessary things to fulfill their wishes.”

The fairy explained again, and suddenly she had something in her mind. “Oh yeah, I haven’t introduce myself. My name is…” And she flew up, putting her hand around her stomach, and bowed down. “Eliace.” Solus turns downwards. “So I’m supposed to follow you, back to the elf’s land?” Eliace nods her head, with a bright smile. “Mm! And that land, is the land of Welcya!”

Solus began to stand up, and the fairy flew up too. “Should we continue our way?” Solus nods her head and the fairy landed on her shoulder. “I’ll just tell you where to go.” Eliace seems to make herself comfortable. Solus walks, according the how Eliace told her.

While walking, she’s wondering. Is that man she saw in her dreams the one who seeks for her?

…

Day: Friday
Time: 12.42pm

…

As they walk in the forest, slowly, seconds, minutes and hours, and then days passed. Eliace is hungry, and her stomach growls out, enough for Solus to hear her. “I think we should stop for lunch. I’m a little hungry…” Eliace said, flying up from Solus’s shoulder. She flew off, and before she got further away, she turns back to Solus. “Should I get you something?” Solus just shakes her head, and the fairy flew off.

She walks over to a tree nearby, and sat down, leaning against the tree. She closes her eyes, and she took a deep breath. She opens her eyes again, but still, all she can see is darkness. Remembering that she can see anything in her dreams, she wondered, if she could ever do that again.

And after a while staring blankly, she turns back forward again. Then, she remembered of what Eliace told her. All about her being not in a safe place, and that she must be brought to a place, for her own safety. And she also did mention about a girl name Calwyn. And that made her wonder, have she heard of this name before?

All rushed into her thoughts, and soon her mind is crowded. And when she is about to answer all of her questions slowly, Eliace came back. Rubbing her stomach, she flies over to Solus, with a satisfied smile. “That was nice! You should try some! I would bring some back for you but it’s just too heavy for me to carry.” She said, turning to Solus as she sits down on her shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

She asked her, but Solus just shakes her head again. “You sure? You’ve been so quiet all this time, and it freaks me out.” Eliace said, wrapping her own hands around herself, and shivers a little, showing Solus an impression. “This is just me.” Solus told her, and stands up. “Let’s continue our road.” She walks, and the fairy nods her head, and tells her the way again.

…

Day: Friday
Time: 12.54pm

…

“You’re really weird, compared to the humans and the elves.” Eliace told Solus, but she only keeps quiet. “One thing is, you talked too little. And the second thing is, how come you don’t have to eat?” Eliace asks, a little curious about the answer. But, Solus just shakes her head, once again. “Like I said, it’s just me.”

“You should try to learn to communicate with other people, for instance, me.” Eliace said, turning her head forwards, but eyes following Solus. “You’re not people, you’re a fairy.” Solus said, and Eliace smiles awkwardly. “Yeah… You’re right…” She said, scratching her head. “I’ve always wanted to know what’s it like to be big. Being a fairy, being so tiny… Not being able to carry stuff like you guys can…” Eliace mumbled.

“Eliace, tell me more… About Welcya.” Somehow, what Eliace had mumble just now, reminds her of Timothy. And she wouldn’t want to remember that anymore, so she just have to change the topic.

“Welcya? Well, it’s a beautiful land filled with greens. And the elves there are nice too. Besides, not only elves lived there, they accept other species as well, species like me, fairies. And also, there are little people, who are much smaller than dwarves, and slightly bigger than us fairies.” Eliace said, remembering of how Welcya is like.

“I just love it there. And I know, you’ll love it too.” She said, smiling gently. Solus thought about how Welcya would be like, and remembered of the town she used to stay at. Maybe, it’s better for her to leave that place. It’s filled with bad memories anyways. That’s what she thought. Maybe, the humans there will live better too without her. The more she thought, the more she remembered about Timothy.

Maybe, if she isn’t there, he wouldn’t have died too. And maybe, right now, he’ll just have normal friends, human friends… Though she still does not know of how he died, she thinks it’s better not to know.

Eliace opens her eyes again, and turns to Solus. “And…” That one word made Solus snapped out of her thoughts, as she continues to listen to Eliace. “Welcya is a land of harmony. Though different species lived together, we never fought. And that’s why, Welcya is one of the best kingdoms ever.” Eliace said, smiling even more brightly. “And thanks to Welcya, I’m able to know Miss Calwyn and Lacy, my two best friends in the whole world!”

Lacy, now there’s a new name. “Lacy?” Solus asks, and Eliace nodded. “Yeah… Lacy, she’s Miss Calwyn’s…” And before she could finish, Solus cuts in.

“There’s someone near.” Solus stops her footsteps, trying to hear it out. “What’s…” And again, before Eliace could finish, Solus’s finger landed in front of Eliace’s lips. “Better not to talk or they might hear you out.” Solus whispers and Eliace nods her head, putting both of her hands in front of her lips, sealing her lips.

“They are… Coming out.”

…

Day: Friday
Time: 1.13pm

…

Humans… It’s only humans, coming out from behind the trees and bushes. Solus could hear their footsteps. “1…5…20…44…76… There are too many of them.” She mumbled, and Eliace hides in her hair. “Wha-What are they?!” She raised her voice at this point, frightened. “You said your land’s always been in harmony, right? Then you have never known enough about this filthy world.” Solus said.

And she turns, and runs. Eliace pulled her hair as she did so. “Can’t you fight?!” Eliace had to shout, for the situation’s getting a little tense. “With this many of them, I can’t.” Solus said, still in a calm mode. “But! Running won’t stop them from aftering us! Besides, why are they aftering us?!” Eliace shouts, and finally, she flapped her wings, flying and soon is already behind Solus.

“I hate them!!” Eliace shouts again, and Solus frowns slightly. “Enough with your shouting!” She raised her voice too, and turns, leaning against a tree, hiding. Eliace quickly got to her, as Solus gasps for breath. Eliace is scared, but she still turns to Solus. “You’re tired already?! You’re just like the humans! Getting tired that easily!” She shouted.

“Shut up!” Solus yelled, angered as she mentioned about her similar to a human. “I can run…” Solus mumbled, as she starts to run again, but this time, slower. Eliace is already faster than her, with just the same speed. “You’re too slow!” Eliace yelled, and Solus tightened her fists. “Alright!” She shouted, stopping, and turning back to the humans. “I’ll just fight them…” She mumbled, facing the crowds.

“I can’t fight, but kill if I use my ability. But, I can fight with normal moves.” And slowly, the humans are near. But, then she remembered. If they are humans, they might back off after she shows her right eye for only a while. She closes her left eye, and opens again, showing them her right eye, but not by taking off the cloth, just like how she showed Timothy.

Strange, they don’t seem to stop. And just when she is aware of her dangerous position, and when Eliace thought it’s going to end, an enormous heat could be felt.

A large fireball falls on the humans, and the whole place burns up, except for Solus and Eliace’s spots. Solus could felt a strong sense of power, but not as strong as the one she felt from the man in her dream.

And she could hear Eliace shouting out, with a happy tone.

“Lacy!”

…

End of Chapter

COOLNISS to the MAX!!!!!

I'm not sure what to say, but its decent. :good:
8/10

Erm... Starting from next week, I'll post every Monday, cause it seems like I'm only free during the weekends to type the story out... So anyways, I'll be posting the next chapter tomorrow. Then the another chapter on Monday.

Chapter 3
-Lacy-

…

The heir of the Winhka family,

The one who uses fire,

Is a playful little elf girl.

…

Day: Friday
Time: 2.02pm

…

“You corpses are surprisingly easy!” A voice of a 13 year old like girl could be heard, as more flames burn up the remaining humans. Solus’s eyes widened. It’s been a while since she had killed someone, for that’s what Timothy want her to stop. And now, humans are killed right in front of her, in a large number, in a short time.

And when all the humans are burnt, the flames slowly fade away. Slowly and slowly, the flames are gone and there are only smoke, and burnt corpses. A figure could be seen slowly, as the smoke was blown away. And a girl walked out of the smoke.

“Yo!” She said, winking and walking towards Solus’s direction. Solus didn’t move, and never even make a sound too. But Eliace happily flew over to the girl, with a bright smile. “Lacy!!” The girl smiles back to her, and Eliace stops in front of her, waving her hand. The girl waves back her hand to Eliace, and turns to Solus, and smiles. “Hi. You must be Solus right?”
…

Day: Friday
Time: 2.25pm

…

“Yeah… Those ‘humans’ are actually corpses. They are already dead. Those you faced just now are just empty cores with someone controlling them. Oh by the way, Eliace is sent to get you, right?” The elf said, turning to Solus while walking, with Eliace on her shoulder. Solus nods her head once, and kept quiet all the time. How come she didn’t know those humans were corpses? She could have known that, but she just didn’t. And besides, her right eye is feeling weird more and more every day.

“Oh. I haven’t introduced myself yet.” The elf turns back, facing Solus, and Solus stops her footsteps, before knocking into her. “My name’s Lacy. Lacy Winhka. Of the fire elves’ family.” She extends her head, for Solus to shake it. While waiting, Solus didn’t really know what to do. “Umm… You should shake my hand?” Lacy whispered, and waited again. Solus extends her hand, and didn’t know what to do anymore. Lacy took her hand, and shake it, smiling.

“Okay… So now, we are all heading back to Welcya right?” Lacy asked, almost to herself, but Eliace answered. “Yep! We have to get back to Miss Calwyn, for our time left is short.” Lacy then places her hand under her chin, with a thinking pose. “If so, I guess we should run back.” Lacy said, smiling. She turns back to Solus, and Solus didn’t hear her just now, she was having thoughts. “What?” Solus asked, and Lacy grabbed her hand. “Don’t let go ‘cause this is going to be a bumpy ride.” She said, and ran. Her running is fast, that’s what Solus thinks. And she couldn’t quite keep up.

After 42 minutes of running, they finally stop. Solus gasps for breath, but Lacy only sweat a little. “What’s wrong, Solus? Heh, you’re really just like a human.” She said, smiling, and walk past her. Solus was a little sensitive to that, and her head followed Lacy. “I’m going to get food. Eliace, you stay here with Solus first.” Lacy said, and Eliace showed a grumpy face. “But I wanted to follow you!” And, Lacy answered. “If I were to bring you with me, Solus must follow.” And she left.

Eliace sighed heavily, and she sat down on a grass again. While Solus tries to forget what Lacy had say, she sat down on the grass too. “We’re still inside the forest… I guess we need one more day to reach Welcya.” Eliace said, turning to Solus, who didn’t seem to reply her or give her any reaction. Eliace began flying to Solus, and hangs in the air, in front of Solus. “Oh come on! Talk a little!”

Eliace showed a grumpy face again, wanting someone to talk to her. Solus turns to her, facing her, and turns away again. “Not now…” She mumbled, and stood up. She turns and walks away. Eliace’s eyes widened, and she shouted. “You can’t go away! Lacy couldn’t find you if you were to walk away!” But Solus just ignored her somehow.

She just wanted, to have some quiet time.

…

Day: Friday
Time: 3.57pm

…

Solus almost slept as she wandered into her thoughts. It’s been quite a few times already, since she had to wake herself up. She has questions that need answers, but somehow, she felt like its better if she won’t know the answers. But right now, another question bothered her. What is she?

She is not human, since she had this eye. She is not elf, since she doesn’t act like one. She is neither any creature in the world. What is she? Could she really be a human? But the eye. She would not want to be a human either, for she despises them. Until she wanders even deeper into her mind, a voice rang.

“I guessed that you would be here.” Lacy walked out of the bushes, with Eliace beside her. “Many people love to come here, and look over to the view.” And there, they see a large view of waterfalls, and flowers right under the cliff they are at. There are small animals too, running around the area. Solus continues to sit in her position. She does not know of how the view is like, for she couldn’t see anything. And another question came up. Why is she ‘gifted’ with that eye? That eye that causes her that much trouble.

“We’re late right? So come on. I’ve got food back there, and the animals might take our food away.” Lacy said, as she bent down and grabbed Solus’s hand again, and pulled her out. They walked back to the place where they were just now, and somehow Solus just follows her, like how she used to follow him. She turns her head downwards, as Lacy leads her.

There’s only silence when they walk back. As they reached to the place, the food wasn’t there anymore. Lacy snapped with her fingers, as she sighed slightly. “Let’s go and search for the food again. I figured it’s better if we eat it right away we found it.” And then, Solus followed her again.

And as the search of the food begins, Solus had been asked to sit down, and wait for Lacy and Eliace to finish finding the food. Though it makes her feel she’s useless, but she wasn’t really minding that. She got back to her thoughts, and slowly, unaware of her whereabouts.

“Here.” Lacy’s voice cuts through the silence once again, as Solus snaps out of her thoughts. She could smell fruits, fresh fruits. “Let’s eat.” Lacy said, squatting down and took an apple and bites it. “It’s really tasty.” She said, with her mouthful. Eliace took one berry and bites it too. “Yeah…” Solus slowly reaches to a banana too, and slowly peeled off it’s skin.

She took a bite, and remembered of his food, that is made for her. After that bite, she never did take another bite anymore. “Solus?” Lacy called out for her, and Solus just turns and faces her. “Why not try the other fruits if you don’t like that banana?” Lacy said, with a smile as she handed her an apple. “The apple is tasty, you know.”

Solus puts the banana away, and took the apple. She took a bite, and tastes it with her tongue. She closes her eyes, as she remembered the time when Timothy watched her while she’s eating. After swallowing that, she opens her eyes. “Thanks.”

…

Day: Friday
Time: 4.44pm

…

After some time of eating, Lacy stands up and smiles brightly. “I’m really full!” She said, rubbing her stomach as Eliace flew up to her side, with a smile too. “Those fruits are really nice.” Lacy nods her head, and turns away, only to notice there are animals hiding behind the bushes, wanting to have a taste of the food they got.

Solus turns to the direction where Lacy is heading towards. Lacy squats down beside a rabbit, and the rabbit was about to escape. But Lacy opens her palm, and there’s food. The rabbit stopped, and slowly turning back, and sniffed the food, and ate it.

Lacy smiles brightly, and soon all the other hiding animals came out. They all surrounded her, and Eliace flew over too. Though Solus couldn’t see this, she knew in her heart, that it’s a warm picture, of an elf, surrounded by small animals, and a fairy who accompanies her almost her whole life.

Why… Can she be that happy? Why… Can’t I be like… Her?

And her mouth mumbled something.

“Why can’t I… Be an elf…?”

All of a sudden, Lacy turns to her. “Come on and join us!” Lacy said, with a brighter smile. Right after she said that, Solus jammed. Her mind suddenly brought up Timothy. And then, her mouth mumbled something again.

“Timothy…”

And Eliace interrupts her thoughts. “Yeah! Join us!” After hearing that, her legs start to move by its own. And she could feel it, her legs are moving, straightening, and soon, she’s standing. Right after she stands, she walks towards them.

Before she even notices it, Lacy was already in front of her, extending her hand, and grabbed Solus’s hand, and pulled her over to the animals. At first, the animals are aware of her, and Solus herself did not know how to treat animals.

Lacy grabbed Solus’s hand again, and pulled it over to the rabbit’s head, and rubbed the head slowly. While doing this, Solus’s hand is still guided by Lacy’s warm hand. “See? She’s nice, isn’t she?” Lacy said, to the animals with a smile.

Why… Does she remind me of him…?

Solus turns over to Lacy, and back down at the animals. Soon, she had a warm feeling in her heart.

Why?

…

Day: Friday
Time: 5.23pm

…

“It’s a little late, isn’t it?” Lacy said, turning over to the setting sun. “I guess we should proceed with our road to Welcya. Or else, we might not make it in time.” Lacy said, almost to herself. But Eliace did reply her. “Yeah… Or else, Miss Calwyn might face troubles again.”

Solus just follows behind them, quietly. She is thinking about what happened just now, and why is Lacy reminding her of Timothy. And most importantly, why did she remembered Timothy and had that strange feeling?

“Oh yeah, Solus.” Lacy said, stopping and turning back to her. “Before we enter Welcya, I would like to bring you to a place, which is around the entrance of Welcya. To see someone, who can answer any question you ask. But only one question for one visit. I thought it might be useful to you.” She said, with a smile, and turns back forward.

Solus nods her head slightly, and turns her head downwards. She had too many questions that need answers. But in the end, she thought of the one true question she wanted to ask. And she will ask to know the answer.

…

End of Chapter

Interesting.

Your skills have improved. :8/10: :good:

Keep it up, eh?

Hehz. Ty! ^^

Sorry. I guess I'll just give up with my 'system' of posting. So, chapter 4.



Chapter 4
-Questions-

…

Questions lingering in her mind,

Questions that need answers.

Only one can answer to her questions,

Is he the one?

…

Day: Saturday
Time: 6.58pm

…

They are now on top of a small cliff, as Lacy looks down to the view. “There.” She said, pointing forward, to a tiny cottage quite far away from them. “That’s the place we are heading now. After that and we’re in Welcya.” Lacy said, turning back to Solus and smiles.

Solus still has that emotionless face, as she’s facing to the ground. Lacy noticed that, but she didn’t mind it anyways. “I guess we should just head there tomorrow. Why don’t we rest for a while, huh?” She said, still with that smile on her face. “I’ll go get some food.”

As she said that, she left. Solus sat down under a tree, leaning against the tree. Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t even notice that Eliace is with her there. Eliace flew around, bored. She turns back to Solus, after bored of staring into the view under the cliff. “Wanna chat?”

She flew over to Solus’s shoulders. “Why are you so gloomy?” She asked, but Solus did not answer her. “Come on! Talk to me! I’m bored!” And when she raised her voice, Solus heard her. “Huh?” Solus asked, turning to her. Eliace sighed, and repeat what she said. Solus shook her head and turns back forward. “This IS me.”

“I know that’s you but people have their active side too, you know. Yours is just hidden somewhere and waiting for you to show it out.” Eliace said, with a bright smile. Solus listened and shakes her head again. “No. I don’t have any. HE took all of them away from me since 10 years ago…”

And at that moment, she had flashbacks in her mind.

“He who?” Eliace asked, blinking, curious. “No one.” Solus answered, and Eliace sighs again. And just then, Lacy is back. “Come on guys. Let’s eat and rest for the night. If we head out early tomorrow, we may even reach there by evening and get a good night sleep on a bed!”

Lacy places the fruits on the ground, and took one for herself and started eating it. “Sweet. But not as sweet as the last ones.” Eliace took the grapes, and eats it too. Solus took an apple, and took a bite, and chew very slowly. And as time passes, they finished their food, and all search for a good spot for their slumber.

Lacy chose to be on top of the tree Solus is sitting under at, while Eliace chose Lacy’s chest. “Nice isn’t it? The moon.” Lacy said, staring at the blue, calm moon. Solus turns up too, but can’t see anything, and she turns back down again. She wanted to see it for herself, and she knew she could, if she takes the cloth that covers her right eye down.

Lacy closes her eyes, and sniffs the air. Eliace is already fast asleep, and Solus is still in her thoughts. “Solus, how’s life living with the humans?” Lacy asked, turning down to Solus. Solus never heard of this question before, and faces downward. “It’s…” And then, she remembered all the stares, and when she tightened her fists just because of remembering those humans she hated so much, Timothy came to her mind.

She released her fists. “They’re arrogant sometimes. But still, they can be forgiven if you look to their good sides. But most humans can’t control their evil side. So I can’t say I enjoy living with them.” And when she finished, she let go of her breath.

“I see… Well, I guess I can’t get used to that. Since in Welcya, they are all so fierce about discipline.” Lacy said, continue staring at the moon. “I guess we should just sleep for now. Good night, Solus.”

“Good… Night, Lacy.”

…

Day: Saturday
Time: 11.44pm

…

Solus struggles, and she turns her body around, frowning. But her eyes are closed, obviously, she is having a dream.

Dream

She ran, and ran. Without knowing why she wanted to escape, she just know a few million of monsters are aftering her. She gasps for breath, felling tired from all the running. But she did not want to stop, for she remembered what Eliace and Lacy used to tell her, the fact that she is just like a human.

Her breath got harder and harder, and she finally stopped. But by then, the monsters are all on her back, on top of her, and slowly falling down on her, with their mouths open wide, to eat her.

And the cloth covering her right eye falls off, the monsters instantly disappear. She can see with her right eye now. But her eyes are wide open, afraid that she might kill someone again. But by the time she turns up, no one’s there. She is alone, in the dark.

“Lacy…? Eliace?” She called out. “Timothy?” Then a man in a black suit appears in front of her. His eyes blindfolded by a cloth, and his powers are overwhelming, just like how she felt in her previous dream. He had a wicked smile with him, as his hand reached to her right eye, and pulled her eye out. She yelled. Pain, she could felt enormous stinging pain.

She fell onto the ground, and she could smell blood. Her hands slowly reached to her right eye, and touch the skin. And slowly, her left eye seems to be showing her something.

And she woke up.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 5.43am

…

“Finally, you woke up.” Lacy said, handing her some food, and she stands up. “We have to leave now. Eat while we walk.” Solus stands up too, with the food in her hands. She followed behind them, and her right hand reaches to her right eye, and feels it. She sighs with relief, knowing her eye is still there.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 3.20pm

…

“Earlier than I thought, we’re here already.” Lacy said, as they see a cottage in front of them. Eliace flew over and knocked on the door as hard as she could, but still, it’s still too weak. But then, the door opens too, by itself. Lacy walks into the cottage, and Solus follow her in. Inside, it’s only an empty cottage, but with tables and chairs, and a bed on the side. A simple cottage.

But in the center, Lacy opens a passage, towards the underground. Solus followed her. She climbed down the stairs, and somehow, she could imagine a huge land under the ground, filled with elves and some fairies in her mind now, as if she is in a place like that now.

And she is. Soon, there came an old elf. “Lacy! Welcome back!” The elf gave Lacy a hug back, as Lacy ran to him. “And Eliace. You’re as cute as ever!” He rubbed Eliace’s head a little, and turns over to Solus. “I see you got a new friend, Lacy.” And when the elf is about to get closer to Solus, he stopped, feeling something really strong with dark energies from Solus.

He backed off, and gasps for breath. “What did you brought with you…” He said, as Lacy quickly help him. And at that moment, he saw an eye. He quickly backed off even more, and Lacy stops him. “Please, Grandfather. She is only a friend. She will do no harm.” Eliace nods her head quickly too.

Solus turns downwards, knowing why is he reacting like that. Usually, those who possess strong powers could feel this energy released by the eye, and some may even feel uncomfortable if they are around her. And this old elf, might be one of them. Lacy too, but she’s just ignoring that energy she felt. Solus could feel really strong magic from him, and she knew he is strong, but he is just old.

He listened to Lacy, and trusted her. “Let me rest for a while.” He said, nodding his head, as two elves came to help him to bring him to his room. Another elf came over to them, and introduced herself. “My name’s Janethyne. I would be your guide for today.” She said with a smile. Lacy smiles, nods and grabbed Solus’s hand.

…

Day: Sunday
Time: 6.34pm

…

They are sent to their own rooms after the tour. And they are said to be invited to a dinner with the old elf just now. They are both given dresses, but Lacy preferred wearing her normal suit. Solus did not say anything, and when they are told to have a bath, Lacy did not hesitate at all. But Solus did not want that.

The elves who serve them all insisted, but Lacy helped Solus. “That’s ok. She wanted it her way, so let’s just give her some freedom.” Lacy said to them, and they bowed down, and left.

Lacy took a quick bath, and the both of them, followed by Eliace went to the dinner. When they entered a room, a dining room, specially for them, they saw the old elf. “Please sit down.” He said, and Lacy sat down too, and slowly, Solus copies her.

The old elf noticed that Solus did not change her clothes or even take a bath. He understands that, and didn’t mind that. “I must apologize, Solus for my rude behavior just now.” He said, bowing his head down a little. Solus nods her head once, and turns away.

Then, the food came. They ate, with no talking at all. Solus eats too, but very slowly, as she is not used to having three meals a day. And when the meal is finished, the old elf talked first. “Let me introduce myself, Solus. I am the leader of the elves of the underground, which are also the ground elves. My name’s Heben. Funny name, right?” He said, chuckling a little on his own.

“No, Grandfather, it’s not a weird name.” Lacy said, with a bright smile. “Oh, you’re as sweet as ever, dear Lacy.” Heben turns to Lacy, and then back at Solus. “If Lacy brought you here, means that you have question that needs answer. Do ask.” He said, waiting for her question, and so is Lacy.

Solus hesitate for a while, if she is to ask that question. And, she moves her lips. Even Eliace, is listening too.

“What… Am I?”

…

End of Chapter

Hmm. .. interesting! You've definatly gotten them to be longer, and you make it so it can't lose someones attention. :8/10: :good:

I still can't shake the feeling of Elfen Lied when I'm reading this though, and I have no idea why.